The Nation

Evidence of local man’s wild night recorded on shirt

8 May, 2016. 11:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact DESPITE NOT KNOWING what happened after 10pm, a local journalist says he has a fair idea after looking at himself in the mirror. Stained with red wine with a hole burnt through the armpit, 26-year-old sports writer Alex Dewhurst said it must've been fun, but he doesn't really remember anything. "Thank Jesus, Allah and...

Only A Very Small Part Of Melbourne Has Trendy Laneways, Says Jaded Middle Class

8 May, 2016 10:15 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Residents of Melbourne's outer suburbs have today insisted that the outsiders perception of the Victorian capital is nothing but a result of good marketing and incessant instagramming. Every year Victoria’s population grows by the size of a packed MCG. One hundred thousand new people are added to the state every 12 months. 92 per cent of those new...

What no young Australian releases before they head out tonight

7 May, 2016. 18:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact KNOWING FULL WELL HE shouldn't be preparing to go out 'clubbing' tonight with the boys, one 27-year-old is throwing caution to the wind and doing it anyway. Not because he's broke or just plain boring - it's because he knows he'll be talking to members of his extended family tomorrow after what's...

‘Ugly’ Logie Award to come with optional paper bag this year

7 May, 2016. 15:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact IN LIGHT OF RECENT REMARKS by a leading figure of Australia's entertainment industry, the organisers of the TV Week Logie Awards has decided to issue the trophy this year with an optional paper bag to go over the top of it. It comes after revelations that many winners of the prestigious gong have...

Experts Confirm Cops Will Never Be Cool, Even With Viral Dance Videos

7 May, 2016 10:15 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT It started as a viral video challenge that started as a police recruitment strategy by some rhythmic Kiwi police officers dancing to the groovy sounds of My Boo by the Ghost Town DJ's using the hashtag #runningmanchallenge. The original challenge video, initially made popular by American sports stars and teams who posted videos of them performing the dance, was...

First-homebuyer protesting budget sets self on fire outside Scott Morrison’s home

6 May, 2016. 11:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact AFTER BEING TOLD THAT he'll never be settled in Sydney, a first home-buyer has set himself alight outside Treasurer Scott Morrison's Sutherland Shire home to protest the obvious short-comings in his budget. The prospect for young people of not owning a house in Australia's largest city is unfathomable, especially after the journey...

George Christensen MP Calls For Ban On All Migrants Except Nepalese Kitchen Staff

6 May, 2016 13:15 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT George Robert Christensen MP has today called for Australia to close all borders to migrants, asylum seekers and refugees - unless they are Nepalese and willing to work in a pub kitchen. The rotund Member for Dawson has today announced that he can no longer remain silent over the fact that "when it comes to Asians"...

Farmer’s son doesn’t like Bob Dylan despite driving his header for 10 years

6 May, 2016. 9:45 KEVIN DANIELS | Editor-at-large | Contact EACH SCHOOL HOLIDAYS HE'S sowed more acres than an idle townie drunk - he's more trusted than even the most experience Irish backpacker. He's a farmer's son. When the eventual heralding happens around the start of Easter of the great Summer Holidays, he'll find and excuse to stay down in the warm country - an...

Report: Australians Not Really That Laid Back

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact THOMISH MADHAMEETIOU IS OFTEN the life of the party. Booze, women, party drugs - each weekend is a Brazillian barbeque of sin and liquid virility. Outsiders and acquaintances claim that the 26-year-old would die each Monday if he didn't share his genetic material with at least four other people. But some weekends are what's know as a 'bye-weekend',...

Barcaldine Forced To Endure Yet Another Condescending Visit From Labor Party Stalwarts

3 May, 2016 14:45 BEAU CHANDLER | Barcaldine Correspondent | CONTACT Tree clearing in Queensland is hotter than Cloncurry in high summer. With local farmers pulling into Bacaldine over the weekend offering to pull down the famous Tree of Knowledge, in an attempt to save residents from any future patronising ALP parades. As former prime minister Bob Hawke was pushed in a wheelchair leading the...

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