The Nation

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact There were chaotic scenes this morning at the French Quarter local courts after the son of a prominent banker failed to have his conviction sealed by the court. Johnathon Hugh-Poon, the 19-year-old second born son of Betoota Grove hedgefund manager Alastair Poon, pleaded guilty to a string of charges earlier this month under the proviso that his convictions would...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact It's the Holy Grail of any recent teaching graduate. A full-time job. Gone are days of working in pubs and clubs at night or breaking shit up and throwing it in a skip bin on your off days. The land of paid holidays, leave entitlements, long-service leave and paid sick days. For one local man, that...

Extreme weather has battered Australia's east coast, causing severe erosion on Main Beach - a popular tourist destination - which has already been hammered due to previous erosions. After days of severe weather and massive swells smashing what was left of Byron Bay's famous beach has all but disappeared, and that's not just an alarmist position taken by climate change...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Byron Bay has washed into the sea, ruining the holiday plans of millions over this summer. There is no more beach, no more going to markets and eating nice meals. No more alfresco living and certainly no more beach time. So where are the nation's stock of reletively wealthy white folks going now for holidays? "They're coming...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact Bartender and mixologist Andy Samson could feel some eyes burning holes in him this afternoon as he frantically tried to get through an overly burdensome cocktail order. The part time employee at the Royal Coke Hotel in Betoota's Data Entry District was meandering his way through the afternoon shift, pulling happy hour beer after happy hour beer. That was until...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT With mounting house prices and increased cost of living (see Coachella tickets) becoming more widespread, welfare and lifestyle margins has become an important issue for many members of Generation Y. With youth organisations working hard to provide support for young people dealing with an array of different issues, one organisation has sought to help perhaps the most ostracised sub-group...

TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact Deciding to cool off today at Betoota's lesser-known waterparks, the old Mansfield Quarry, Betoota Heights man, Jason Pane (32), experienced what can only be described as the most inconsiderate and sadistic act known to any beach loving Australian — shaking one’s towel near other beachgoers. The old Mansfield Quarry was opened to Betootanese people from...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Try as the might, the Inter is bogged. Rather than face the ultimate humiliation and get Dad to come and help you, two local brothers attempted to save face today and get Big Red out of a bog by themselves - but both of them knew their efforts were futile. After a few scuds passed through...

MARC VENUTI | Editor | CONTACTOn Monday morning at approximately 7:30am, local party legend Pete Tal was overheard, whilst sitting cross legged on the grass at Betoota Park, laughing in disgust at everyone heading to work. It was reported that six hours into his acid trip and only minutes away from his third pinger, Pete remarked to Pixie, Line and Zela (three friends he made at...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia's best known bush ballad, Waltzing Matilda has today been recreated on the couch of a Woolloongabba apartment, as an itinerant Brisbane worker boils a billy in his temporary living arrangement. The man, Ned Coffey, is a twenty-something gatorade sax player with on and off work in landscaping. Currently he is camping out on a mate's couch until his parents...