Sports

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Following Port Adelaide's win over St Kilda and the Newcastle Knights putting a monstrous seven points on the Dragons - local bloke Jack Cort was already feeling like he was on a heater. Then a little trotter by the name of 'bundy sundy' ran 1st place at Menangle. Jack was ecstatic. At three legs into his multi, things are looking...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A new scheme aimed at promoting freshly made health foods to school children currently being implemented by state governments around the country is being blamed for a lack of 'big boys' in Australian rugby circles. Wallabies Coach Michael Cheika says that while current Wallabies front rowers are probably the strongest in the current line up, he's worried about the...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A man who isn't Lance Armstrong apparently won the 104th Tour De France bicycle race over the weekend, it has been confirmed. Majority of the world, who only really learnt about the cycling race when someone won it seven times in a row, were unaware of the fact that the Tour De France was still a thing. "What?" said one...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A recent survey by ESPN Australia has found that out of all Australian sports stars, the perennially injured NBA player, Andrew Bogut, would be probably the worst possible company on a camping trip. While iconic Australian sportspeople such as Shane Warne, Steph Rice, Andrew Johns, Warwick Capper and Cathy Freeman sat comfortably in the top ten - Andrew Bogut...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In a move applauded by ex-private school boys across the country as a God send, Twiggy Forrest has confirmed that he will throw his weight behind the embattled Western Force. The mining billionaire has a long history of donating to charity and said earlier this year that he will give $400 million back to the people, after...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The notorious Queensland Maroons State Of Origin side have this morning been criticized by NSW supporters and coaching staff, as well that nation's online bookmakers, for their unfair use of Bernard Fanning as the pre-match entertainment at Suncorp Stadium. The Northern rugby league dynasty secured their 12th win in 11 years last night with a 22-06 domination over the...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In a dramatic last resort, Tennis Australia has today confirmed that they have been forced to call on special help when it comes to mentoring wayward sports star Bernard Tomic. A spokesperson from Tennis Australia says that after repeated failed attempts at bringing the 24-year-old into line, they have no other option than to enlist the...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Australia's peak scientific body concluded their investigation into which bush sporting was the toughest earlier this month, leaving many questioning the study's findings. At a press conference this morning, a spokesman from the CSIRO said that after a decade-long taxpayer-funded investigation, they were able to prove that AFL had the toughest bush competition, followed by rugby league, then cricket, then...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Queensland coach Kevin Walters has played down fears that a lack of a right foot could see Billy Slater sidelined for Wednesday’s State Of Origin series decider. Slater has flown from Queensland inconspicuously after gruesomely snapping off his ankle at Sunday’s opposed training run at Sanctuary Cove. The 34-year-old has spent the past two days icing the open flesh wound as Maroons...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The head of the National Rugby League's Diversity Unit has empathised with his AFL counterpart, saying that if he committed a similar, sickening assault on a player, he'd probably be promoted. Though he said he never would, Milo Georgiou explained to The Advocate that the cultures are quite different between the two sporting codes and that if somebody...