IN-Focus

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Opposition leader Anthony Albanese is in Queensland at the moment but this weekend, he says, he's got his Marrickville Californian bungalow to himself and he and Toto are going to have themselves a time. Attending a press conference this morning with Labor's candidate for Bowman, Donisha Duff, the Member for Grayndler explained that he's excited...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The New South Wales Health Minister told journalists this morning that they need to build a bridge and get over the fact that a bunch of private schoolboys got the precious Michelle Pfeiffer jab because it's already happened and he doesn't have a time machine to go back and stop it from happening. "It happened,...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Reserve Bank of Australia has agreed to keep interest rates almost non-existent for another quarter which should make sure property investors see another increase in the value of their asset. By keeping interest rates low, the projected increase in the value of capital city property will only freeze more and more young Australians out...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Sydney man is today wondering why in Blue Christ the city has recorded a further 35 cases after spending the weekend running all over town for reasons some might deem to be unessential. Myles Tanner, who lives near one of those overrated beaches down there, told our reporter via telephone that he went to...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact In Machattie Park yesterday, a local teenager asked his dad what it was like in the olden days when politicians used to be accountable for their actions. "But Dad, you keep saying that they're lying and that they made mistakes which have cost hundreds of lives," said the kid. "Like how the Head of Government Relations...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The media blackout of the Opposition continues today even after leader Anthony Albanese fired 12 rounds into the Press Club audience in an effort to gain some media coverage of the speech. Six people are currently fighting for life in various Canberra and Sydney hospitals this evening after being hit by stray bullets fired from...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A 28-year-old Betoota Heights man explained to The Advocate today that he's unsure of what he'll get first - the PlayStation 5 that he pre-ordered last October or the Michelle Pfeiffer jab that some public servant promised him in March. Sam Overell, nephew to The Advocate's reporter Clancy, said he's been waiting for things to...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Prime Minister Scott Morrison has dropped the ball again and now the nation is anticipating Opposition leader Anthony Albanese will pick that ball up and run with it. If Morrison is somehow able to dive on the lose pill, Australia are waiting for Albo to put the boot into him. "The Prime Minister went on...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local law enforcement officer from the City Of Betoota Metropolitan Police has reportedly shot and killed a shopper this morning inside a French Quarter supermarket. The officer came upon the scene to find a grown man attempting to purchase an entire pallet of toilet paper, leaving the countless other shoppers without any. After trying to...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Former Acting Premier of Victoria James Merlino is enjoying a union-mandated rostered day off (RDO) today after months of leading the nation's most European city-state through the wagging tail of the Pangolin's Revenge. The snow-guns were on in Melbourne's CBD today as Merlino took time to blend into the crowds as best he could. Now...