IN-Focus

Sharehouse Resident Prepares For Exhilarating Game Of Brushin’ Roulette

TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact Ali Murphy is sick with Adrenalin this morning after she arrived in her share house bathroom having forgotten which toothbrush was hers. Desperately needing to clean her teeth before work, Ali took a deep breath, prayed and reached into the overcrowded container of toothbrushes The sharehouse...

Bloke Promises Girlfriend A Nice Dinner In Hopes Of Wrangling A Couple More At The Pub

TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact Alcohol loving man Nathan Shuck is clutching at straws this evening after learning his girlfriend is en-route to the pub to pick him up. Even though Nathan has been at the pub for a while he was still not ready to pull up stumps. Thinking...

Recent Home Leaver Not Feeling So Cocky After First Run In With Fitted Sheets

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT Recent home leaver, Brendon Smith, has just moved into his first ever sharehouse - a ten bedroom monstrosity located on a main road in Woolloongabba. He reportedly lives with 15 other students, who were all too happy to swap their tenancy rights to a fair number of...

Porn Ruined By Original Music Score

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT Oliver Gosford had been scratching his nether region when he thought he’d have a cheeky pull. Opening up his browser, Oliver brought up his go-to porn website and began the arduous task of finding the right video. “It’s not easy finding the right video, and the recommendations are pretty...

“At Least He’s Reading” Says Mum Of Teen Halfway Through Scar Tissue

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Betoota Heights mum Vola Warne (50) has managed to find some comfort in the recreational activities of her aspiring-busker son Jackson Warne (16) upon noticing the young muso was reading a book that hadn’t been assigned by a teacher or anything. Initially excited that her son might have an...

Curious Local Woman Immediately Regrets Taking Photo Of Her Side Profile

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT Local woman Lauren Gilbert was enjoying an afternoon shopping with girlfriends when she caught sight of her profile in one of the multi mirrored changerooms. Bolstered by the flattering lighting and in an unusually masochistic mood, Lauren decided to take some pictures of the side of her face...

Man Who Collects Soggy Leaves Finally Gets A Pool

FRANKIE DeGROOT | News | CONTACT The purchase of a new pool is always an exciting event, but especially so for soggy leaf collector Anand Dyer. Anand, who owns Australia’s second-largest collection of soggy leaves, took delivery of a new 6x3m fibreglass inground pool this week and expects that it will be fully installed...

Local Bodybuilder Has Been On A Juice Diet For Years

TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact Sitting at a Bulimba café on a sunny weekday morning after a solid lead session, bodybuilder Rheece Johnson ears pricked up after hearing a woman go on about an amazing new juice diet she’s been on. “So here I am thinkin’ you beauty, a summer flame who’s on the...

Sky News Uncle And Vegan Niece Form Silent Pact To Not Ruin Christmas

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Christmas miracles may not just be for early 20th century films where you have to ignore the racist bits. As with all families that would rather spend Christmas Day with the side of the family they actually like, the McGregors organised a pre-Christmas gathering to enjoy a couple of...

Garlic Heavy Lunch Valiantly Defeats Several Rounds Of Mouthwash

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT An inner-city businesswoman has royally fucked up her day by eating garlic chicken salad for lunch. The account manager in question, Mikayla Ellis, reveals that she’d left her ham and cheese sandwich on the kitchen counter and was forced to buy from the overpriced bistro located underneath her office. Torn between a...

Social

735,898FansLike
574,288FollowersFollow
59,741FollowersFollow

Breaking News