IN-Focus

Toasted Sandwich Filling ‘Can Melt Steel’ According To Government Study

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A week-long study into toasted sandwich filling conducted by Australia's peak scientific body has concluded that the molten food...

Bloke Who Went Fishing For First Time Last Week Says His New Nano PX 762 Is Best Rod Out

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A bloke who went fishing last weekend, for the first time since his childhood, is now really a fishing guy, it has...

Local Woman Still Not That Interesting Even After Getting A Wrist Tattoo

PUTNEY SWOPE | Lifestyle | CONTACT A local woman finds that people still deem her uninteresting despite having just gotten a wrist tattoo. Evelyn Mitchells, 24, currently...

Despite Swimming In Credit Card Debt, Local Student Casually Starts Planning Next Holiday

ERROL PARKER| Editor-at-large | Contact With the memories of New York in fall still fresh in her heart, a South Betootanese occupational therapy student has...

Rural Teenager Enjoying That Brief Phase Of Adolescence That Isn’t Devastated By Ice

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Rural, but town-based, teenager Leon Needham (14) is really enjoying life at the moment. He's got a girlfriend, playing A's...

LOVE IS NOT DEAD: Local Romeo Lets His Partner Rip The Foil Off New Milo Tin

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Keen to make up for his many faults and personality defects, a North Betoota carpet layer has broken with...

Yuppies Queue Outside Trendy Bakery For A Loaf Of Bread Like It’s Communist Russia

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Despite the oppressive desert heat and sheer expense, a number of local young professionals have spent the morning queuing...

“This Magic Button Makes It OK For Me To Double Park Like A Complete Fuckhead”

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Pulling up outside his favourite sandwich shop in South Betoota, Graham Frogberk is of the opinion that if you...

Bill Shorten attempts to cultivate new ‘bad boy’ image by wearing Bailey Nelsons inside parliament

9 February, 2016. 15:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The leader of the Opposition has shrugged off a number of personal attacks from the Prime...

Tongue Simply Not Capable Of Dislodging Food Caught Between Teeth

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT For 23 year old Hailey Gibbs, today has a been one tenacious struggle with a singular piece of meat lodged between two...

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