ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Troy Buswell, the disgraced former Treasurer of Western Australia, has blown the conch of Vasse this morning to herald his intent to run in the Rockingham by-election triggered by the resignation of Premier Mark McGowan yesterday.

A dull tone was heard over Bunbury just after 11am this morning as the one-time premiership-hopeful took a deep breath in, as if he had just come across a fine chair, and blew into the shell that the people of the last Liberal holdout in the great South West keep for such occasions.

Mr Buswell was convicted of numerous domestic violence charges last year and was sentenced to a suspended prison sentence, ruling him out of running with his beloved Liberal Party in the upcoming Rockingham by-election as they allegedly have some standards when it comes to pre-selecting candidates.

Nevertheless, Mr Buswell has informed The Advocate that he will be running as an independent and that he will win.

“I am considering running as one of those teals,” he said via telephone.

“Not that I’d get any cash of that Holmes-A-Dork, anyway. No, I will just have some teal-colour corflutes. There’s not much budget so I will need to do them all by hand.”

It’s understood by The Advocate that Mr Buswell has been living under the name “Troyothy Trainbad” and has been working as a pin monkey at the Bunbury Ten Pin Bowling Club. However, the 57-year-old denies this.

“You must’ve read that on PerthNow. Hardly a reputable source. Much like wikipedia. Not very reputable. Why? Just go to my page on Wikipedia and look at the controversies. Every single on the them is untrue. The only one that is vaguely rooted in truth is the alleged incident with the family-sized lasanyer [sic] but that is for another time,”

“I’ve done my time in purgatory, it’s high time Troy takes back what is his. The top job. Premier of the West.”

When asked how he hoped to achieve this as an independent, Troy sneered and laughed.

“They won’t have a choice.”

More to come.


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