Andrew Bolt has done his best to appease his insatiable appetite for causing controversy today, by condemning the government’s plans to develop a travel bubble with New Zealand.

Speaking from his desk in the ever emptying Sky News Studios, the outrage merchant who can’t go a week without desperately desiring to see his name trend on Twitter (partly because the broken news model of the company he works for dictates that and partly because he’s a narcissistic man) decide to slam the Trans Tasman Travel bubble today.

“This is so symptomatic of the radical left-wing trajectory this country is heading in,” he said in his measured voice shifting from side to side and staring at the camera.

“We are in the worst pandemic in a century, and the government is obsessed with pandering to the left by creating a travel bubble for Transgender people.”

“Now, how, how can this possibly be, this is the most disgraceful piece of discrimination I’ve seen since I was told I can’t racially vilify people,” he said.

A producer could then be seen coming across the screen to tell him that the Trans Travel Bubble was actually just a bubble between New Zeland and Australia and anyone was able to travel.

“I don’t care, I don’t care about facts. How long have you been here,” he spat at the producer.

“I’ve never cared about facts, especially when they get in the way of my divisive aggression that keeps me from getting a shitty job with somewhere like the IPA”

“This government is trying to discriminate against people like you and I, by only allowing Trans people to fly to New Zealand and have a holiday.”

“And it must be stopped at all costs.”


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