EFFIE BATEMAN | Local News | Contact

Local woman Jemma Benson reckons she’s doing a good job avoiding her ex on social media and proudly admits that she only checks his relationship status ‘once every two months or so.’

Though she leaves out the fact she regularly looks up his entire family and friendship circle, including a step sister she never even met, Jemma insists she’s moving on with her life just fine.

However, after a night out on the town, Jemma reportedly found herself sitting in the darkness of her room, drunkenly scrolling through her ex’s Instagram for clues that he was going on a regret fuelled bender.

Unfortunately for her, his latest pics included mostly shots of a friendship group she was no longer involved in and a gym selfie where he was looking especially ‘swol’.

“Why do I do this to myself”, moans Jemma as she navigates his profile with surgeon-like precision.

“I got him that fucking shirt.”

“Does that mean something? That he still wears it?”

“Oh god I should stop.” In a haste to exit his feed, Jemma accidentally clicks on his Instagram story which is stupidly located right next to the back button.



In a state of pure panic, Jemma quickly deletes her Instagram account in the hopes that her name will disappear.

Unfortunately, after doing a quick Google search, Jemma realises that deleting her account was the worst possible thing she could have done as not only can her ex still see her name, but now she’s completely locked out for three hours.

“I swear I was being so careful”, says Jemma.

“I even made sure to scroll on the right-hand side so I wouldn’t accidentally like anything.”

“Honestly what’s the fucking point of looking at your ex? It’s not like they’re going to post anything where they look bloody miserable.”

More to come.


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