Coalition nightwatchman and current Prime Minister, Scott Morrison, has today been unable to get his party to agree that gay kids shouldn’t be expelled from Catholic schools for being gay.

This backwards slide in policy indicates that the Coalition government is almost as obsessed with gay kids in religious schools as the rock spider priests and teachers that appear to make up a worryingly large number of the education staff in these institutions.

This appears to be quite an interesting feat, considering that the Royal Commission Into Institutional Responses To Child Abuse found that roughly 20% of all clergymen in Australia over the last century have either abused children, or protected abusers.

Leading to many political analysts asking who are the 20% of the Coalition Government who think that the Catholic Church and similarly stigmatised religious institutions should be allowed to do whatever they want – even after the Royal Commission findings that indicate that most of them should be shut down forever.

This follows the nation’s Catholic schools sensationally announced last month that would vow to rid all their schools of pedophiles, once they had gotten rid of all the gay kids – who’s sexual preferences reportedly goes against the teachings of the Church.

Prime Minister proposed a conscience vote earlier Wednesday after Labor and the Coalition failed to find a compromise on changing the Sex Discrimination Act.

This comes after months of discussions between the Liberal and National Party MPs, who after considering how badly their government is performing, decided it is time to focus on the big issues that concern all Australians.

Namely, the fact that the 13% of Australian private schools that are run by the church feeling like they are being bullied by people who think they shouldn’t be able to pick on gay kids.


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