CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact

The last 31 days spent not touching any grog were all for nothing, it has been confirmed.

That’s according to local accountant and prominent boozehound, Kylie Reid (30) who recently undertook the gruelling month-long abstinence from alcohol.

The third of August marked the first Friday arvo drinks that Kylie had taken part in since the start of July, meaning she had had actually done more like 34 days off the piss.

“I was absolutely tongueing for one” she says.

“In a way that construction workers say they are on Friday arvo drinks. It was deep within my bones, I just needed to get extremely groggy”

Dry July is a not-for-profit organisation that challenges people to abstain from drinking alcohol for the month of July to support adults living with cancer across Australia and New Zealand. In contemporary Australian culture, people seen to have raised money while continuing to drink during July are considered ‘dogs’ and ‘cowards’.

However, despite being honest about completing Dry July and raising over $202 dollars (mostly donated by her parents who just want her to settle down) – Kylie has undermined all the health benefits that come with taking a month off.

“I drank from 5pm to 5am” she says.

“I had a few friends in the same boat. We ate a pub meal at around 7pm and then KFC at around 4am”

Lying in bed this morning, Kylie says she’s terrified she may have taken up smoking again last night and is considering taking another month off.

“As of Monday, I reckon” she says.

“I’m meeting the girls at the pub in about an hour”

 

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