With thousands of Aussies struggling to find RAT tests and recent news of New South Wales fining those who don’t submit results, many are left wondering if it’s even worth notifying the government, given the amount of hoops they need to jump through just to get an answer.

Despite RAT tests made here in Australia, including a facility that pumps out 100,000 a day to the international market, the government has, as usual, fumbled the bag when it comes to looking after it’s own. 

This has included Brisbane manufacturing facility ‘Ellume’ which won a government contract to supply millions of test kits to the US, after failing to secure approval from Australia’s Therapeutic Goods Association.

This is in stark contrast to the nation’s drug dealers, who have no trouble trafficking narcotics across multiple continents to supply tradies and financial workers alike with half-cut booger sugar.

The Advocate speaks to local financial advisor Bryce Rydon who too, likes to fumble a bag.

“It’s a weird world we live in isn’t it?” says Bryce, shaking his head, “it’s not easy to chase a bag, even harder when the borders were shut.”

“Still, it only takes me a few phone calls and a bit of running around.”

Mumbling something about the price being inflated to $350 for what was essentially talcum powder, Bryce says that finding illegal substances was far easier than getting a RAT test.

“I’ve tried everywhere and I can’t find a test to save my life”, says Bryce, “even asked some of my shady mates and they can’t source any either.”

“At this point, a bag’s probably cheaper too.”

More to come.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here