TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact

A bored shitless corporate suit has narrowly avoided exposing her disinterest in her fifth meeting today by emitting a grunt at precisely the right time.

Stephanie Milwani was in the middle of a daydream about her upcoming holiday when her survival instincts kicked in and forced her to nod her head and make an agreeable grunting sound in response to a colleague’s question.

It’s believed the grunt was enough to snap Stephanie out of her stupor and to quickly catch up on the conversation that’d passed her by.  

The Advocate caught up with Stephanie shortly after the end of the meeting to get her first-hand account of the event.

“I can’t even tell you what I agreed to”

“You know how it is with meetings, your feckless little colleagues finally get a chance to speak and they just go mad”

“I think one bloke spoke for 5 minutes straight without actually saying anything”

This is an all too familiar situation for office-working Australians, with a recent report indicating that there are about 5 million meetings held every single day.

The report goes on to say that only 30% of those meetings are productive because people spend more time scrolling through memes or looking around the room and internally questioning every other person’s intelligence.

It’s not yet known exactly what Stephanie agreed to in her meeting, our reporting is continuing her investigation and will have an update shortly.

More to come.  


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