LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Reports of a mysterious ute rattling along Channel Country motorways has been confirmed in an exclusive from The Advocate.

The presence of the enigmatic ute was confirmed by our reporter making a trip onto the highway in his seldom used ‘92 Subaru Brumby he paid $15,000 for (plus $19,000 in repairs) before realising he now had to learn to drive manual.

Pulling up behind the ute going 40km under the legal limit (and 60km under the unspoken local limit) our reporter confirmed that the ute was going slow in order to compensate for the fact that the cargo in the tray was in fact secured by Blind Freddy himself.

“Yeah those straps look like they had one thread left in them, as if they had held this load since time began,” said one other driver who pulled up at the servo on the edge of town, pausing to Google a blokier word for bungee cords.

“Maybe he doesn’t want to cause a Final Destination style pile up by sending an esky of white eggs across the Diamantina Developmental Road. He clearly doesn’t care how many L platers overtake him.”

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