EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

As bored empty nester Deb Harris scans the news, she finds herself bristling at the constant flux of Meghan Markle photos.

Not because she hates her (she’d shoot on sight) but because she’s yet to see even one photo, where Meghan doesn’t look impossibly stunning.

Because say what you want about Miss Meghan but by God, that woman leaves everyone for dead – which is even more insulting, seeing as she’s older than William, Kate and Harry.

And, Deb finds herself seething, only ten years younger than her.

What a BITCH.

With perfectly styled hair, a side profile to die for, and the complexion of a twenty-five-year-old, Meghan’s face has been plastered on every news site even more often than usual, which has seen every the most uninvested in the royal family secretly acknowledging how pretty she is.

Even if she’s apparently ‘smirking’ or ‘fake crying’ or whatever the fuck some crusty journalist who hasn’t had a good root in a while has come up with.

“SHE’S A NARCISSIST THAT MEGHAN”, squawks Deb, completely unprompted, “she ruined the Royal family, broke the Queen’s heart.”

“And got her claws into that weak Harry.”

Regardless of whether Meghan Markle really is a narcissist, gold digger, out for herself or the thousand other hateful descriptions people have flung at her, the level of sheer vitriol this woman has received is ridiculous – especially when compared to Prince Andrew, who Royalists love to bypass when remarking about someone ‘ruining the Royal family.’

So what she went on Oprah, or she created a Netflix show or did anything other than melt into the background, is that really deserving of being non-stop abused by the media, millions of horrendous trending tweets and death threats?

Even if she’s done everything she’s accused of doing, how is she more deserving of hate than the countless people in power who have also acted in their best interests? What about political leaders who’ve defrauded people, raped people, rubbed shoulders with pedophiles, pardoned war criminals or enlisted inhumane immigration policies?

Apparently, that’s all far less reprehensible than anything Meghan Markle has done, if the countless speculative news articles, documentaries, personality analyses, psychic readings and podcasts are anything to go by.

Just like Monica Lewinsky, Janet Jackson, Megan Fox, Anna Nicole Smith or the many other women who’ve been undeservingly lambasted by the public, there’ll likely be many podcasts in the future deep diving into how unfairly Meghan has been treated by the media but by then, the world will decide another woman deserves persecution for being hot and existing.

More to come.


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