LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Australians enjoyed a refreshing change in the news cycle this week as local landlord Fiesel Hill (62) admitted that he hadn’t worked hard for his property portfolio.

With Labor shopping around a two year rent freeze, land barons across Australia have put their hands up and said they cannot afford such an initiative without having to somehow work for a living.

Owner of nearly 300 properties, modern day slumlord Fiesel Hill appears to be the only landlord who is not too fussed about the possible rent freeze.

“It’s about time I went out there and did some work,” stated Hill, chuckling at the novelty of having to spell check his CV.

“Most of my tenants didn’t have jobs during the pandemic but they kept my income afloat so this seems fair.”

“This whole landlord thing, it’s gotten a bit boring. Father helped me buy the first property and then I just kept buying more and more and more, leveraging the last one to buy the next. It became joyless after a while, tedious even. I would have sought counseling over it but it was making me money.”

Managing to complete a sentence without blaming Millennials, Labor, or anyone but himself, Hill conceded maybe he would need to rejoin the workforce or just sell a few of his properties for a profit.

“At the end of the day I made an investment and it’s not paying off. That was a risk I took. Landlords understand that right?”

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