LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Just as the planets of the solar system will infrequently sit in single file, health & science experts and the coalition government have agreed on something; that you all better stay at home like you’ve got nothing better to do.
Current reactions to self-isolation have been mixed with some loving the excuse to stay in while others are using it as a golden opportunity to rally the household in a cleaning charge that will drive others to break the rules and cop a $1000 for eating cheese in a park.
The only shared experience that seems to have united everyone practising self-isolation is that all these naps really do leave you feeling a bit tired, hey?
“Well I overslept a bit which left me knackered, then after my after-lunch nap I was wrecked so I went to bed early again last night and fark me I’m still a bit drowsy this morning,” stated self-isolator Leonie O’Driscoll (36).
“I’m having one more nap then I’m done with them, they’re honestly exhausting.”
Health experts have given a stern warning against excessive napping, reminding the public that side effects include tired eyes, messy hair and hating yourself for wasting your precious time on earth.
Prime Minister Scott Morrison has disagreed with these ‘alarmist napping warnings’ stating that he has been napping throughout most of 2020 and he’s fine so far.