ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has been able to salvage the nation’s reputation abroad once again – this time, with a late-night phone call to his Croatian counterpart in an effort to put this Novak Djokovic affair to bed.

In a morning press conference in Canberra, Mr Morrison explained that the Croatian President Zoran Milanović was very quick to acknowledge that there’d been a mistake and they were looking to move on.

“I spoke at length with President Zoran Milanović last night. I wanted to make sure that we wouldn’t let our two great nations be divided over this issue. He was very forthcoming in saying that a mistake had been made and that errors on Australia’s part, as well as Novak’s part, had been made. In a perfect world, we would’ve never needed to have this phone call but I wanted to smooth things over,”

“Because diplomacy is key to our growth and having strong relationships with our European slash Asian neighbors is key to our growth. Uh, yeah. So I’d like to put a line through this whole Novak affair. As my friend, the New South Wales Health Minister Brad Hazzard once said, it’s happened, get over it, move on. I like that mantra,”

“Watch this space. We will not be the first country to deny Novak entry due to a strong and stringent COVID-19 policy. He will probably get the boot from France, which is ironic considering it’s a shithole full of COVID and people who constantly complain about how bad Australians are, which I reckon it’s pretty rich considering there are 50 000 Australians buried over there who died defending them from the Germans, but that’s just me. Like I said, watch this space.”

The Advocate reached out to the Croatian Consulate in Betoota Grove for comment but they were equally as adamant a mistake had been made and refused to comment further.

More to come.


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