ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A Betoota Heights mother-of-four has told her children to stay the fuck away from pubs, clubs and whatever the hell young people do these days because if they catch the Sydney Sneeze, somebody is going to get it.
This Christmas, Wendy Dodson is pushing the boat out.
Lunch will be large, both sides of the family are coming up from interstate – but all of this could be undone if one of her kids catches the Berejiklian Bark before her big day.
“I swear to Christ the Birthday Boy, I will fucking blow my lid if one of you gets this thing,” Wendy told her kids yesterday afternoon via group call.
“So just stay away from crowded pubs and concerts. For a few days. On Boxing Day, you can all go and do whatever the hell you want but if you catch this thing and you bring it back here, you’re done. I will finish you.”
Her eldest, Damien (34), said get wasn’t planning on doing anything and Wendy said she already knew that. The forgotten middle boy, Sam (29), said he had already come back from the US for Christmas so he’s not going to be making any promises as he’s got mates to catch up with and cold schooners to inhale. Wendy said she understood completely but also told him that he’s gambling with his fucking life and to be prepared for the consequences.
Maudie (25) told her mother that she would also take precautions but has a full week of partying lined up so she’d probably welcome death by the time she arrives home next week. Wendy laughed and said she will take no joy in taking her down after she tests positive at the airport. Donnie (19) said she will do anything for her Mum and will do what she’s told. She’s also hoping for a used Suzuki Swift for Christmas so is playing her cards accordingly.
More to come.