ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

At the National Press Club this afternoon, Canberra’s media enjoyed a nice lunch and refreshments as they listened to gas escape from one of Australia’s wealthiest beanbags.

The sound of the leaking noble gas resembled a soft Melbournian drawl and some there swore it sounded like policy ideas for the upcoming Federal Election, which the beanbag hopes to do well in.

The beanbag was repeatedly interrupted by a bloated pint of milk that claimed to be a former furniture salesman from Sydney, which angered the beanbag.

For just under an hour, the journalists sat and listened to the escaping gas and some were even game to try to communicate with it.

The focus is now on finding out how the beanbag found its way into the building, says the National Press Club’s secretary.

“We like to invite innate household objects to let their gas out from time to time, especially when there’s an election near,” they said.

“For example, next week have invited a fiddle-leaf fig to speak. He calls himself Adam Bandt. We don’t usually like to have two people from Melbourne back to back but sometimes, that’s just how it works out,”

“The beanbag that spoke today, though, was actually quite good if you ask our members. The noise of the case spilling out made a few good points.”

More to come.

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