FBI Re-Opens Investigation Into Who Really Killed Harambe

"There's a lot of people who are quite emotionally invested in this investigation, myself included"

FBI Re-Opens Investigation Into Who Really Killed Harambe

21 July, 2016 14:45


The Federal Bureau Of Investigations is reopening an investigation of possible mishandling of classified information by Hillary Clinton and her top aides after the Department of Justice decided not to pursue charges against her for the cold-blooded murder of Harambe the Gorilla.

FBI spokesman Brian Jaginsky announced the probe into Clinton’s alleged vote-grabbing decision to have her friends at the Cincinnati Zoo shoot the critically endangered crowd-favourite in the brain – without taking the time to consider other, more appropriate, methods of subdueing the animal.

“We will aim to be as expeditious as possible, but we will not put artificial deadlines on the process,” Jaginsky said. “Our goal will be to be as transparent as possible about our results, while complying with our various legal obligations. Obviously this is a matter of dicks out for Harambe – there is not denying that,”

“It is true that Harambe had a young child in his hands, but there is an argument that he was merely trying to raise him as his own and not hurt him – a similar scenario we will see in the upcoming Margot Robbie film TARZAN.

Jaginsky did not give details about the precise information officials were evaluating. When the probe was launched two months ago, officials said it pertained particularly to a set of emails that came from Hilary Clinton’s email account.

One question they were investigating was whether or not Clinton had timed the murder of Harambe to distract from Donald Trump’s arrival in Cinccinati

Separately on Thursday, Republican politicians said they would now ask the FBI to investigate whether Clinton lied to the committee.

That announcement came in a testy hearing with FBI Director James Comey, who defended the government’s decision not to prosecute Clinton over the murder of Harambe

But Jaginsky said this week that former officials can still face punishment. Options range from counselling and warnings, to the electric chair.

“There could be repercussions,”Jaginsky told reporters on Wednesday, saying infractions identified would be kept on file. If she is responsible, she will be brought to a swift justice,”

“There’s a lot of people who are quite emotionally invested in this investigation, myself included”

“RIP Harambe, real niggas never die”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.