WOW! Caboolture Man Wins $25m Powerball, Spends It Exactly The Way You Imagined

WOW! Caboolture Man Wins $25m Powerball, Spends It Exactly The Way You Imagined

11 August, 2016. 17:15

MERV HARRIS | Lifestyle | Contact

The lucky punter that scooped the pool of the entire $25 million first prize on last Thursday night’s Powerball jackpot draw has been revealed as Caboolture water heater salesman Chris Boyce, who is still coming to terms with the massive windfall.

The Advocate understands that Mr Boyce bought the winning ticket on his way home last Thusday afternoon after “a session on the dish-lickers down at the rissole with the boys”.

“Was there with Benny and Thommo. Yeah, we were havin’ a punt” he said.

“Next thing the bloody missos onto me ‘bout comin home, but I was goin’ past the newsagent so I thought I’d have a crack,”

“Luckiest cunt in Caboolture I tell ya what!”

Australia’s newest millionaire said the win would change his family’s life forever.

“25 mill is fuckin heaps, I’ve already hotted up the Dunny Door (Holden Commodore)”

“Fuck she’s looking good.” he said.

“We’ll get a new TV, one of the real fuckin big ones from JB Hifi”.

“Gonna go on a shopping spree, The son’s already in my ear about picking him up some flash TapOut shirts and jetpilot boardies”.

Chris’s wife Amanda said they might buy new house and it that if so, they would “probably get one of the ones down near the shops” she said.

“There’s some real new ones down there, prolly get one with two bathrooms I reckon, but needs room for the boat!”

The Boyce’s are understood to have purchased a 12 foot tinny from a neighbour.

Benny Armstrong, who is a friend of Mr Boyce, had the following to say, “That lucky bastard! Hope he takes us to Bali for the weekend. Fuckin love Bali”

3 Responses to "WOW! Caboolture Man Wins $25m Powerball, Spends It Exactly The Way You Imagined"

  1. Dave white   August 12, 2016 at 11:22 pm

    I reckon the cunt should put on a Barbie and a keg for all the Cunts in the street!

    Reply
  2. Leanne   August 14, 2016 at 4:44 am

    Hahaha what a ripper lol

    Reply

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