14 November, 2016. 13:34
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
FOR THE MANY THOUSANDS of young Australians who spent long hours, often late at night, on the frontlines of the Great Meme War have been officially recognised by the Returned Services League and are now eligible to join their local club.
The move comes after Donald Trump’s victory was partially attributed to the quality and quantity of neo-conservative memes coming out of internet imageboards such as 4chan and Reddit.
However, some existing members of the RSL have criticised the move, saying that it wasn’t a ‘real war’, per say.
“You can tell me that playing with pictures of a green cartoon frog carry the same weight as me, for example, who had to bayonet, machine gun and stack scores of Korean and Chinese teenagers in order to be called a war veteran.” said Campbell Greenholm, a Korean War veteran and president of the South Betoota RSL Club.
“I’ve honestly shot people dead, slit throats, you name it. I’ve taken human life. I still see their faces from time to time. Whether it be in the supermarket, in my dreams or even in the ones I love. Not that the government cares about people like me who can’t seem to sleep anymore.”
“But now you’ve got these neck-bearded manlets walking around the club in Pokemon tee shirts. Hell, the Meme War representative has a smashing pair of tits on him – and he’s supposed to be a war veteran. All I can say is that I’m glad I’m 93.” he said.
However, some of Australia’s newest veterans have hit back at the old guard, saying they weren’t there and won’t understand the intricacies of a strictly online global conflict.
Shayne Economos was raised below the line and found solace from schoolyard bullies in online communities that are now being ‘blamed’ for a Trump victory.
Making memes, often overnight, from his late model caravan on the outskirts of Betoota, the 23-year-old chinless Mi-Goreng disposable unit was on the coalface of meme technology throughout the conflict.
“I may not have cracked a Korean bloke’s head open like a pistachio nut, I may not have burned a handful of Japanese people to death with a flamethrower – but I did influence a US election.” he said.
“It was tough out there, we lost a lot of good memers along the way. Some just grew out of it, others got girlfriends. The real heroes never made it back.”