Overly polite fuckboy renews subscription to GQ magazine

"Style. Luxury. Life. Girls. The only Four Corners you need to care about"

Overly polite fuckboy renews subscription to GQ magazine

26 October, 2016. 23:34

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

TAKING A MID-AFTERNOON BREAK from doing nothing, local ‘art director’ Gavin Coolidge took the time out of his day to renew his subscription to GQ magazine – or as he puts it, his life bible.

Full of interesting style suggestions, enchanting tales of life and luxury as well as helpful hints on how to turn an innocent date into an X-rated fuck fest, GQ magazine has bucked the downturn in print media – bosting an ever increasing circulation.

Only two short years ago when Coolidge was just a shit-kicking young copywriter, he was often seen slinking around the office in jeans and joggers. On Tuesday, he’d wear his favourite AC/DC t-shirt and splurge on a takeaway lunch, instead of enjoying a homemade peanut butter sandwich.

All that changed with the incumbent office fuckboy before him asked if he’d like to join the agency’s mixed touch team.

“That was it for me, that’s when I went from being myself to being somebody that other people might like,” he said. “Being on the mixed touch team, getting some cardio really raised my self-esteem.”

It was around that time when he first picked up a copy of GQ from his local newsagency. What he read blew his mind.

“As it turns out,┬áthe reason why none of the girls at work would even cough in my direction wasn’t because of the obvious flaws in my personality, but because of what I was wearing to the office each day,” he said.

“So after taking a few suggestions from the magazine, I started dressing like a young professional fuckboy and stopped quoting Acca Dacca when I was trying to chat up chicks around the water cooler,”

“I still think ‘You’re like a statue of Venus with arms, and all you’re missing is my penis,’ is one of the best pickup lines and it’s from an AC/DC song.”

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.