26 October, 2016. 23:34
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
COLLIN BURNSIDE HAS ‘CARPE DIEM’ tattooed on the inside of his right arm – and that’s the life motto he’s chosen to live by.
The 24-year-old Hutchinson project manager seized the day and grabbed himself a basket full of bargains this morning at his local ALDI megastore.
Originally planning to grab some cheap pastrami and pre-packaged potato salad for his work lunches, the Gemini simply couldn’t walk past a rack of cheap wetsuits and outrageously priced left-handed trumpets without taking the chance to stock up.
“It’s not often you get the opportunity to buy a left-handed trumpet and a wetsuit in the same shop,” he said. “It’s even rarer that you have the chance to pick them both up without breaking a pineapple!”
However, it’s not always been as rosy for Mr Burnside.
Last year, he missed out on the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to buy a solar-powered ride on mower from the Tingalpa ALDI – something that still fills his heart with profound pangs of sorrow.
The Wynnum Bay local promised to himself then and there that he’d never let an ALDI-related bargain opportunity pass him by ever again.
“After I missed out on the solar-powered ride-on mower, I was devastated. Even though I live in a flat, it was a bargain. $399 for a ride-on, Jesus Christ. You don’t see that anywhere,”
“Anyway, that’s why I’m the proud owner of seven left-handed trumpets, three generic wetsuits and about half a pallet of Iced Vovos. My father reckons I’m dreaming… I guess I am.”