Local man wracked with post-piss anxiety after drunkenly admitting he loves U2

At least it wasn't Keith Urban.

Local man wracked with post-piss anxiety after drunkenly admitting he loves U2

22 May, 2016. 13:34

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

THE SQUAD BEGAN LIGHTING him up on the group chat before the sun came up.

Not because he made an inappropriate pass at someone he shouldn’t have and not because he publically exposed him.

He blacked out, telling his friends he can’t remember anything after 5pm. He was on autopilot.

But the boys cannot stop laughing at him because, in the depths of his binge, he told them all he loves Irish pop group, U2.

“They won’t drop it. I can’t believe I said that. I don’t actually like U2 that much,” said 26-year-old bridge and wharf carpenter Jackson Lightning.

“I would’ve rather the squad tell me I tried to fight a bouncer, or I kicked in somebody’s car door. Anything but that. Once I almost got caught listening to U2. I had a CD of theirs playing in the car when I went to pick up a mate. When he hopped in he said: ‘What’s this shit?’ before I explained my girlfriend had borrowed the car,”

“It was a close shave, but now there’s no going back.”

Despite having a few OK songs, it’s still considered a huge social taboo for a blue collar twenty-something to like any U2.

In 2014, a 19-year-old Ipswich plumber was beaten senseless by his boss for singing along to Vertigo, the opening song of the band’s 2004 release How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb.

It’s understood by Queensland Police that the teen was warned the weekend prior to the violent episode when his boss overheard him humming along to Beautiful Day while on a lunch break.