Dashcam Owner Lives And Breathes For The Moment A Cyclist Does Something Illegal

Dashcam Owner Lives And Breathes For The Moment A Cyclist Does Something Illegal

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

A semi-retired baby boomer who can’t identify why he is so frustrated with the world has today channelled his rage into a new piece of video technology, aimed at documenting the road violations of his most hated subculture.

Bruce Hartson says he is ready to call out cyclists on their bullshit.

“They are clogging up the roads” says the 67-year-old retired pharmacist with nowhere important to be.

“Wanna use our roads like a car, without actually having a car on the road, then pay for their maintenance!”

Bruce says he is sick and bloody tired of these inner-city latte yuppies riding to work from the suburbs (?) and slowing down his commute to Bunnings, where he goes a couple times a week to walk around directionless until someone talks to him about fertilisers or compost.

That’s why he bought a dashcam last month.

In fact, from that moment, Bruce has spent every waking minute hoping for a cyclist to break the law in front of him, so he can upload the video to Youtube or Facebook and interact with other grumpy old codgers who secretly want to see cyclists laying lifeless on the ground.

“I’m gonna ping them” he says, feeling the blood rush through his body like it did the first time he lay with a woman.

“Only problem is these bastards don’t have licence plates!”

“They should pay rego like the rest of us!”

 

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