“Crownies Are Fucking Good” Says Nation’s Crown Lager Enthusiasts

"Mind you, Shar usually gets stuck into the double blacks if she really wants to do a good job on herself."

“Crownies Are Fucking Good” Says Nation’s Crown Lager Enthusiasts

18 March, 2016. 13:25

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

Yesterday morning, national liquor retailer Dan Murphy’s announced that Crown Larger would be from its Premium Beer Section.

The company’s CEO, Chris Stewart, said that the move came after a general consensus from franchisees who pointed out that Crown Lager was mostly bought as gifts by people who do not drink beer.

Dan Murphy's say that they have realised most consumers of Crown Lager are usually forced into it
Dan Murphy’s say that they have realised most consumers of Crown Lager are usually forced into it

However, the nation’s Crown Lager enthusiasts have rushed to the defence of their choice to drink ‘top-shelf’ Australian beer, and have criticised Dan Murphy’s move to relocate the beer to the ‘low breed’ aisle.

Gold Coast based FIFO worker Ken Archer (34) and his fiancé, Sharmayne Saunders (27) have spoken to The Betoota Advocate about their brand loyalty to the ‘classy’ Australian beer.

Ken Archer and Sharmayne Saunders say that they aren't the only ones who enjoy an ice-cold crownie
Ken Archer and Sharmayne Saunders say that they aren’t the only ones who enjoy an ice-cold crownie

“Anyone who runs down Crownies are just bogans with no class,” says Sharmayne.

“Crownies are fucking good,”

After recently relocated their family of four to the ‘Goldie’ – from their hometown of Redcliffe, in Brisbane’s North – Mr Archer and Ms Saunders say that when it comes to ‘having a few’ – they’d much prefer a Crown Lager over a Victoria Bitter or XXXX.

“Seriously, it’s a decent beer. It’s hard to find a decent tasting beer like it,” says Archer, while sitting on his brand new Yamaha Jet Ski in the canal opposite their eight-bedroom rendered brick waterfront mansion.

After a long day on the ride-on lawn mower, Ken Archer says he could easily put away at least half a carton on Crownies
After a long day on the ride-on lawn mower, Ken Archer says he could easily put away at least half a carton of Crownies

“Mind you, Shar usually gets stuck into the double blacks if she really wants to do a good job on herself. Other than that, its Crownies all the way,”

Our interview was cut short by Sharmayne announcing lunch for the family, a satay-chicken lasagne that she had stumbled across in the Women’s Day recipe of the week.

“Lunch is on. That’s about all you’ll get from us today,” said Sharmayne.

“Now fuck off, woulda ya”

5 Responses to "“Crownies Are Fucking Good” Says Nation’s Crown Lager Enthusiasts"

  1. Selkie22.7   March 19, 2016 at 8:06 am

    My dog, Nina, while perusing the above, she is more into looking at the pictures than actually reading all that writing, wanted to know how Ken Archer Esq. had time for the Crownies. Take a look at Shar, she said, almost choking, and she can cook too! Then, she muttered something about the wombat that eats, roots and leaves, and that a bloke can always stay.

    Reply
  2. Geoffro   March 19, 2016 at 5:46 pm

    These 2 ‘people’ make me want to move to London. Or ANYWHERE outside of Australia.
    What I would like to see however, is Sharmayne mowing the local ovals in that gear. How OZ would that be.

    Reply
  3. Squid   March 22, 2016 at 11:58 pm

    Youse cunts are jelly that these Crowned kings and queens of the royalty set are doing better that youse lots in the inner burbs,,,if she wants to do a number on herself with double blacks let her,,, at least the red cordial top ups make her go off like a toad on the Guangzhou gas ,,,, fark lost me pipe – missus musta double hit me diet pills…and pulled me sharpies early

    Reply
  4. Kendal MaCrE   May 24, 2016 at 6:02 pm

    Ken and sharmayne are legends ! So what if your mob win Origin – at least u enjoy a good beer.

    Reply

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