10 August, 2016. 10:15
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
BP outlets across the River City are today experiencing a rare shortage in the ‘speed dealer’ model sunglasses usually available at each service station cashier.
Toby Odone, a spokesperson for the franchise says that while the servo sunnies have always been top-selling item in their Brisbane outlets, a recent spike in sales can be directly attributed to the arrival of the carnival workers currently in town for the Royal Queensland Show, also known as the Ekka.
“It’s been a pretty warm week, and these carnies aren’t exactly used to the sunlight,”
“They arrived in droves this morning before the gates at the showground opened for the public holiday. Our outlets have smelt like metho and White Ox all morning.”
Mr Odone says that while the stores are rushing in new deliveries of pearlescent, wrap-around sunglasses, their biggest issue so far has been the haggling from tax-evading travellers.
“Most of them don’t have bank cards, so I will state on the record that our service stations do not accept any currency other than the Australian dollar,”
“No stuffed animals, no rolls of cardboard tokens – and definitely no goey,”
It is believed this retail crisis is also being felt by rivals Matilda, Shell, Caltex and 7-11 – as the Brisbane Ekka reaches day number five.
Visiting carnie, Bernie Klebold (45) says this sun is fucked up, fuck ya.
“Christ there’s a bitta glare out,” he says.
“Old man reckons it’s always like this come winter in Brissy, but fuck me she’s a bit bright, fuck ya”
“We’ll be down in Tamworth next month, that’ll be the go. She’s too ‘ot up here and the gears no good.”