“After A Wallabies’ Loss, The Only Thing That Cheers Me Up Is Buying More Chinos”

“After A Wallabies’ Loss, The Only Thing That Cheers Me Up Is Buying More Chinos”

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Peter Smith-Jenkins set an alarm on his phone before hitting the town on Saturday night to remind him to be home in time to cheer on the Wallabies.

Today, just two days after the game, he still wishes he hadn’t.

Speaking to coworkers this morning at his boutique-but-ultimately-unnecessary-artisan-local-marketing-firm, nobody for the life of their boat shoes could understand how Scotland, the Fiji of the northern hemisphere, could put 50 on the boys in gold.

“Unbelievable,” said one colleague, cracking his third San Pelligrino of the morning.

“It’s not like when we were playing. The players had a thirst for victory, now it’s basically a glorified boys club that tours the world getting flogged wherever they go. I reckon our firsts could’ve beaten them back in the day!”

However, Peter’s criticisms went further than his friend’s.

But he told The Advocate that he’s since moved on from the loss and that he’s found his own way of cheering himself up.

“Each time the Wallabies have a bad loss, I ask my Dad to borrow the 5-series, drive down to David Jones (even if he says no) in North Betoota and buy some nice new chinos,” he said.

“Maybe some cool new slides for summer. Last time we lost to Scotland, I went a bit silly and bought some 1996 vintage Air Jordans on the company card! Anyway, it’s the only thing that cheers me up in times like this,”

“Lucky we won in the cricket. Otherwise, my whole week would be in ruins! Because sport is my life.”

More to come.



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