ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

In these halcyon days of corded headphones, one local meatpacker says he relishes in being degraded and sexually stimulated by his pair.

Stellan Lambeau routinely lets his headphone cord hang loose down his torso. Waiting and praying for it to get caught on something and rip one or both of his headphones out.

“It is my dream, it is my nightmare,” said the 31-year-old.

The Advocate joined Lambeau in his plush French Quarter apartment which seemed a little bit too nice for a man of his profession.

“I work at the meat plant. I’m a packer. They let us wear headphones when we’re at our station. It’s not legal but he boss doesn’t care. He only cares about money,”

“Which means I can get up to whatever I want each day, just as long as I get the work done.”

His day begins before many of us even consider rising.

A 4am run until the sun meets the morning sky, followed by an intense gym session. All this before 7.

“I run along this goat track through the lantana in Frost Park. It’s full of snags and opportunity to get little cuts on my arms and legs,”

“Most mornings, my headphone cord gets snagged and the buds get ripped out of my ears. I’ve heard that really annoys other people.”

“But it’s like watching a snail slither over a razor blade for me.”

More to come.

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