ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Based upon North Korea’s most recent nuclear test, a bomb of the same yield would all but destroy our bustling inland metropolis – according to a popular website.

NUKEMAP is an interactive map using Google Maps and unclassified nuclear weapons effects data to project what might happen to a location should it be attacked with nuclear weapons.

This morning, our reporters set the crosshairs on The Advocate’s offices on Daroo Street to see where the devastation would extend to.

What our reporters found makes for chilling reading.

“Basically everyone would die, yeah,” said a computer person who works downstairs in graphics.

“See, this is your house. You would die pretty much instantly, which I pretty choice in my opinion. You wouldn’t want to be one of the people that writhe around in nuclear fallout for hours until they finally die,”

“You be one of the lucky ones.”

From the crude graphic on this reporters computer screen, it looks as if the entire town would be wiped out – save for a few streets in Darook Heights and the Outer East Side.

So with that, Kim Jong-Un has to power to wipe our desert community from the face of the Earth at the flick of his supple wrist.

We here at The Advocate sincerely hope he doesn’t.

More to come.

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