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Steve Smith and Cameron Bancroft are reportedly going through emotional turmoil following a weird as fuck 24 hours after admitting to their role in the ball-tampering scandal that has torn the Australian cricket side apart, and disappointed everyone with their weird, juvenile and frankly idiotic actions.

Smith was stood down as Australia captain for the remainder of the third Test against South Africa, which the tourists lost by 322 overnight in Cape Town, before being handed a one-match ban by the International Cricket Council (ICC) after being so weirdly quick to admit to his role in the scandal.

Australia vice-captain David Warner was also removed from his position on the fourth day in Cape Town, after a horrendous fortnight of non-stop sledging from both the opposition and the crowd.

The ICC did not ban Bancroft, instead punishing his ball-tampering charge with a hefty fine and three demerit points, fans are also willing to give him a pass as he’s only a young fella.

Analysts and fans say this whole last fortnight has been fucking weird, from the Sonny Bill Williams chat, right through to this ball tampering shit.

“That sandpaper shit wouldn’t even really work” said one former fan of Smith, a lifelong grade cricketer named Garrett (55).

“There’s no way it could result in a reverse swing. We’ve just lost both our captain and vice captain to a bit of superstition from their end”

Another cricket fan, Monica (63) says this whole tampering thing is fucking weird.

“What a weird fucking thing to do” she said.

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