Over 100 000 bandwagon fans descend on the MCG for the AFL Grand Final

"AFL is like an arsehole, everybody has one - but only Victorians really like playing with it." he said.

Over 100 000 bandwagon fans descend on the MCG for the AFL Grand Final

1 October, 2016. 11:15

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

THE MELBOURNE CRICKET GROUND has sold out once again, despite both team’s supporter bases being made up entirely of bandwagon fans.

After finishing seventh overall this season, West Bulldogs’ story has inspired thousands of ordinary working-class Victorians to come out in force to show support for their ‘second team’.

Same can be said for VFL fans from the Harbour capital, with Sydney left heartbroken after the Greater Western Sydney Giants were denied their rightful spot in today’s grand final. The Swans are in their third grand final in five years this afternoon, something that regular Sydneysiders feel is ‘a bit too Melbourne’ as the Storm rampage into yet another decider.

Making the trip down to the city built on the banks of the pathetic Yarra River, Marcel Crichton said he loves Melbourne in the spring time – and the Bloods.

“Qantas always ramps the ticket price up on the grand final weekend,” he said. “But I don’t fly anything else and I’m not gambling with my life on a low-cost carrier.”

“But the Swans are in another grand final! Can you believe that? I bet you can’t. Hope they get up, but either way, we’re going to drink Melbourne out of rosé tonight [laughs].”

Similarly, West Bulldogs fan Garry Duckworth said he spent all night combing the streets for a stray shopping trolley.

Picking half-smoking cigarettes out of the gutter beside Footscray Station, Duckworth said he was going to the grand final – he just had to find a ‘dopey cunt’ in a Swans scarf to flog over the head with his trolley pole to get a ticket.

“If you get the cunt in the right spot, it’s like they’ve been turned off at the wall. They just drop and fold like granny’s card table,” he explain, spitting through a small gap in his teeth.

“What? You think a bloke from Footscray can afford to go to a grand final? We can barely afford to go to a Storm’s home game. But yeah mate, some Sydney wanker is going to wake up with a headache tomorrow, and it won’t be from the grog.”