Ipswich Residents Assure Pauline Hanson That They Aren’t Scared Of Muslims

"I ain't scared of shit"

Ipswich Residents Assure Pauline Hanson That They Aren’t Scared Of Muslims

15 September, 2016. 10:15


One Nation senator Pauline Hanson’s political comeback has sent shockwaves through the Australian suburbs today, following her maiden speech to the Australian federal senate last night.

Throughout her address, the 62-year-old former Ipswich fish and chip shop attendant said that Australia is at risk of being “swamped by Muslims”.

“[Muslims] bear a culture and ideology that is incompatible with our own,” she said, in the ten minute address that drew almost exact parrallels to her maiden speech in the lower house twenty years ago – only this time around she simply replaced Aboriginals and Asians with Muslims.

However, back in her hometown of Ipswich, Qld, local residents have made a point of telling the media that they don’t share Pauline Hanson’s hysterical fear of the Islamic faith.

Local plasterer, Vai Terepo (33), says that he thinks Pauline might not be as in touch with her hometown as she thinks she is.

“Fuck she talking about” he says, as he exhales marijuana smoke.

“I’m not scared of Muslims. I’m not scared of shit,”

Situated on the Bremer river in South-East Queensland, Ipswich is approximately 40 kilometres west of the Brisbane CBD.┬áThe city is renowned for its architectural, natural and cultural heritage – as well as their booming inland population, which currently sits at around 190,000.

However as Vai’s heavily tattooed cousin Braith points out, the area has changed drastically since she was working as a deep fryer jockey in the family fish and chip shop – and it’s got nothing to do with Asians, Aboriginals or Muslims.

“Pauline hasn’t visited the 4305 in a while, uce”

“If she thinks this is the type of place where young mothers walk the streets in summer dresses. She’s got no clue,”

“This is the fuckin’ badlands. Even the palagis (white people) know how to throw hands. And we aren’t worried about Muslims walking our streets, unless they are wearing badges,”

Another Ipswich resident, Deng, says that Hanson’s claims of “indiscriminate immigration and aggressive multiculturalism” causing crime to escalate and social cohesion to decline are false.

He said the real issue is that they still have asbestos in their primary classrooms and the coal mining in the Western Corridor that has resulted in the ground literally falling out from underneath residents in the shape of dangerous sinkholes.

“Pauline says too many Australians were now afraid to walk alone in their neighbourhoods at night. That’s because the cunt can fall out from underneath you – not because of some bloke in a turban,”

“Muslims aren’t a concern in the ‘swich, bra. Neither are Asians. The only people who voted for Pauline are the ones who live in boring white suburbs. We couldn’t give a fuck,”

Deng, who refuses to tell us his age, last name or occupation, says he can see why she’s so disillusioned with the town.

“I went into the pen when she was in the lower house and, yeah, I only just got out,”

“The place has changed, bra. I agree with that. But if you think it’s the Muslims that are creating trouble out here, you aren’t down with the street.”

“You got more chance of dying at the hands of a drunk truckie on the M7 than over some crazy cunt’s religion,”

“God left this place a long time ago, bra”

7 Responses to "Ipswich Residents Assure Pauline Hanson That They Aren’t Scared Of Muslims"

  1. Kim   September 15, 2016 at 10:32 pm

    Australia now also at risk of being swamped by coal sludge in sink holes.

  2. K. S.   September 17, 2016 at 8:59 am

    I can’t believe that the points of view you used as reference to how people feel about Pauline Hanson’s diatribe are a real reflection of the people who live in Ipswich. I’m sure there were others you could have used. However you have chosen to display Ipswich in the worst light possible.

    I’m sure if I went to your home town I could find an equally derogatory way to paint it to the public. Ipswich has a deep and diverse mix of culture and ethnic population. Shame on your for using propaganda to do this to a city that is a truly great place to live.

  3. pedro   September 19, 2016 at 1:47 am

    Brut,this is a true reflection of.Ipswich. we love the Muslims they bring kebabs and snack packs it’s awesome. The big issue here is sink holes. They’re crazy and ruining the suburb. Driving along and then boom the ground swallows you up. The Muslims are awesome civil engineers and help us to solve the sinking problems and build rail which is much safer.

  4. andrew   September 21, 2016 at 8:26 am

    Brilliant article. Well done chaps. “Even white people know how to throw hands” one of the finest lines belted out from you in a while. Keep up the good work.

  5. RemorsefulDuck   September 21, 2016 at 7:42 pm

    This site is absolutely heartwarming. I am in love. I am sure I will figure out the ‘with who’ bit soon

  6. Gary   September 25, 2016 at 6:57 pm

    I have taken to reading the Betoota Advocate over the BBC given the integrity and core issues the journalists are dealing with. Keep it up guys,


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.