ALP Admits New Campaign Is Mostly About Finding Out Whether Bill Shorten Is Safe

"He's gotta be out there somewhere... Someone has got to have seen something,"

ALP Admits New Campaign Is Mostly About Finding Out Whether Bill Shorten Is Safe

20 January, 2016 11:45


The national president of the ALP, Mark Butler, has today confirmed that the struggling political party’s new outdoor campaign has been launched in response to growing concerns that the Australian opposition leader might have died.

“The Australian Labor Party has seen a lot of infighting amongst about whether or not we write Bill Shorten off completely,”

“A lot of people are concerned, but there’s also a lot of people who don’t give a shit if he’s alive or not,”

The new “What’s Missing” campaign was launched earlier this month in an attempt to reposition the dysfunctional political party as a fairly decent alternative to the LNP – Something they have not been able to do since John Howard refused to apologise to the Stolen Generation.

However, according to Butler, the idea to plaster Bill Shorten’s face onto cardboard milk cartons in supermarkets across the country, was mainly about figuring out whether Bill Shorten was safe. Not only as a candidate, but as a missing person.

“He’s gotta be out there somewhere… Someone has got to have seen something,”

The last confirmed sighting of Bill Shorten MP was on the lawns of Parliament House on September 14 shortly after the announcement of a second leadership spill within the Liberal Party.

“We want people to be thinking about him. If you see him, let us know,”

“Whether it’s in the polls or just a phone call, it’d be good to know where he is.”