The Nation

In what has come as a shock to many, local abstract artist, slam-poet and owner of pink hair, Rose “Moon Girl” Gardener (31) has revealed that she doesn’t always like being the centre of attention. Gardener rose to fame last year when she participated in a piece of performance art called “Sealed in snot” where locals in Betoota’s village square...

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT All local woman Coleen Watts wanted to do was listen to some music. Not watch a short film. It’s alleged the 23-year-old Betoota Heights local was listening to some music on YouTube, when the algorithm naturally took her through some recommendations that were surprisingly to her taste. Unfortunately, as a lover of all things rap and hip hop, Coleen has...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Even though it is nowhere near beer o'clock, a bunch of lads on tour have decided it might be time to treat themselves to a brewski or two at the airport bar, haha. While excitedly chattering amongst themselves as they stride through the terminal, the lads appear to be absolutely ready-to-go, ahead of their out-of-state boys trip. Even after a...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As the Ever Given continues to block the Suez Canal, the Egyptian Government has today announced a drastic new plan to solve the crisis. By bringing in the big guns, and flying over a local father of 4 from Queensland, Australia. This comes as the mammoth 400 metre container ship continues to block one of the busiest waterways...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Scott Morrison has admitted today that he didn't expect his sit down with Tracy Grimshaw to go quite like that. With the stinging criticism about the government's leadership on gender issues continuing, the nation's Head of Marketing decided to face the music and do an interview with the bastion of Australian journalism - A Current Affair. After turning...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some breaking news from our Betoota Ponds this afternoon, it can be revealed that there isn't actually an organised 'Fight Club' at the local high school. This comes after a week's worth of reports from the Betoota Bugle (the News Corp paper in town) that there is a 'disturbing and disgusting organised fighting scene at Betoota Ponds...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT With the debate around gender quotas in politics firing up around Canberra and the country this week, one young man has come out to shut the whole issue down. "Quotas don't work," said Josh Silver-Spoon who is a member of a party with a 25% representation of female MPs across state and Federal Parliament, and a Federal cabinet...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact House prices in Sydney are in dire need of a kickstart as the market stagnates in the economic quagmire of the spicy cough recovery. That's according to the Federal Government today who announced the international travel ban has been lifted on New Zealand, which they hope will expose Sydney to new buyers and increased competition. For...

FRANKIE DeGROOT | News | CONTACT Liberal MP and Conspiracy Theory Connoisseur Craig Kelly has been shocked to find out that he too is on mental health leave.  The decision comes in response to the controversial MP’s history of falling for comical conspiracy theories including classics such as his claim that the Bureau of Meteorology had falsified weather records because 2020 was “the coolest year...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As their counterparts deal with the fallout from the nation demanding some form of accountability for misogynistic behaviour in politics, the Nationals have today announced a key piece of policy. Hoping that the historic amount of rain currently falling across the Eastern Seaboard washes away all those bloody mice! This comes after someone at the National Party meeting...