CSIRO conclude toasted sandwich filling can melt steel beams

"Not surprising news, really," he said.

CSIRO conclude toasted sandwich filling can melt steel beams

19 February, 2016. 17:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A week-long study into toasted sandwich filling conducted by Australia’s peak scientific body has concluded that the molten food stuff is ‘more than able’ to melt steel beams. Earlier today, the CSIRO released a statement to the media outlining the findings – which failed to […]

Cold war between housemates over the washing up enters seventh day

Cold war between housemates over the washing up enters seventh day

19 February, 2016. 17:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Depending on which one you talk to, each member of an infamous sharehouse in Betoota’s Old City district will tell you that they’re not the one to blame for the washing up spiralling out of control. Beginning life last Saturday night after a small gathering […]

Hillsong Still Not Cool

Hillsong Still Not Cool

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Hillsong is still not cool, it has been confirmed. Despite infiltrating the Australian music scene, film industry and the NSW state Government with their brand of morally acceptable youth culture, the Church still isn’t going to be as cool as getting roots and pulling cones. Australian kids who were raised outside of […]

Supportive right-wing Dad trying his best to keep up with alt-right son

"Some of the shit he does is a bit crook," admits Michael. "But at heart, he's a good kid."

Supportive right-wing Dad trying his best to keep up with alt-right son

15 February, 2016. 17:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Without Sky News political commentators like Ross Cameron and Andrew Bolt, Michael Casswell remarked that he wouldn’t be able to sleep well at night know that there’s nobody asking the hard questions. Rather than watch something he’d enjoy, the retired investor often parks himself in […]

Bloke Who Bought 3 Jet Skis During Mining Boom Says Turnbull Is Too Rich And Out Of Touch

Bloke Who Bought 3 Jet Skis During Mining Boom Says Turnbull Is Too Rich And Out Of Touch

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local storeman, Greg Giles (38) says the fact he ‘only makes $60k a year’ from ‘basically running’ a warehouse in Townsville is a perfect example of why Australia has gone to shit. He says, while he appreciated seeing Malcolm Turnbull abuse Bill Shorten on Channel Seven news last week, he didn’t understand […]

Gold Coast Inmates Advised To Guard Their Nipples After Grant Hackett Is Arrested In Southport

Gold Coast Inmates Advised To Guard Their Nipples After Grant Hackett Is Arrested In Southport

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Inmates across several remand centres and watch-houses on Queensland’s South-East have today been warned about the possibility of a nipple cripple in the near future. Moments ago it was confirmed that former Olympic swimmer Grant Hackett has been arrested on the Gold Coast, according to reports from people chasing a police car […]

Sydney Girl, (19), Hopes To Visit A Nightclub One Day, Like In The Movies

Sydney Girl, (19), Hopes To Visit A Nightclub One Day, Like In The Movies

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Although she’s been old enough to vote for over eighteen months, Sydney woman, Sophie Wells (18), still hasn’t seen a nightclub. With a vast understanding of different poker machines and Asian restaurants, Sophie is yet to experience the feelings of excitement that people in other parts of the world experience when they enter a vibrant late night […]

Prime Minister’s leaked Snapchats show human side to Malcolm Turnbull

"Looks like he's having a shit of a time at the moment," laughed one private banker. "Poor bastard. He should be back here with us."

Prime Minister’s leaked Snapchats show human side to Malcolm Turnbull

14 February, 2016. 10:13 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A series of leaked Snapchats between the Prime Minister and his former work colleagues at Goldman Sachs Australia have caused quite a stir in Canberra this morning, with many Labor and Green MPs feeling vindicated after repeatedly labelling Malcolm Turnbull “out of touch” with everyday Australians. […]

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