CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT ABC digital content producer, Marc Wyatt (33) has a little extra spring in his step this morning, after successful closing the gap. For the past two years, Marc has utilised his daily walk to work from Sydney’s Chippendale to the ABC headquarters in Ultimo, by gradually becoming more familiar with […]
"That's the story of Greeks in Australia. We came, we saw, concreted"
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local Greek, Spero Concretopolis, has today unveiled his new and improved backyard to his jealous, also Greek, neighbours. The Earlwood resident who works in fruit transport, has spent the last fortnight ‘sprucing up’ his 1900’s workers cottage. “It’s as smooth as glass, moit” he says while getting high on the […]
"I'm on 3%"
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An ambitious bloke, that you don’t really know that well, wants to know how well you know the actual occupants of the house party you are at. While proving that he doesn’t really know anyone here, Jack (?) has asked if you know if there is any chance that someone might have […]
"Once this bird is known as a bin-chicken, it will be much easier to begin a cull"
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The street bird known as the Ibis will now be referred to as a ‘bin-chicken’ following direct action from the Minister for Agriculture. This follows a series of complaints from official Zoologists, who feel the word Ibis should not apply to the Australianised species. “Ibis is an African word […]
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The wildly popular Meat and Livestock Australia (MLA) lamb advertisement has been well-received right across Australia by revisionists and optimists alike. The advertisement, which shows three Indigenous Australians having a BBQ on the beach while having to keep expanding the event to accommodate all the various people — European settlers, immigrants […]
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT While pushing and shoving at the trough this morning, Sussan Ley MP has told several parliamentarians to mind their own business. When squealed at as to how she manages to maintain a year-round tropical sun tan between her time in the nation’s capital of Canberra, ACT and her home electorate of Farrer, in […]
"Do you know anywhere I would be able to purchase up to 13 and a half tablets of eccie?"
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A caucasian male, driving a run-of-the-mill 2014 Ford Falcon XT with no notable modifications other than an extremely large antenna, is apparently looking to purchase ecstasy. While using notably outdated street lingo, the man, who claims to go by the name of ‘Jimmy’ has asked if anyone knows where he can buy […]
"We are working on it" he said,
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The NSW Premier says Sydney’s first weekend of 2017 has been one without drama, aside from a few noisy late-night frozen yoghurt and gelato stores in the CBD. Baird, who announced his war against night trade in 2014, says he is impressed with the results of the prohibition-style lock-out laws against alcohol […]
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With ABC’s Q&A expected to return to the screens around this February, ABC producers have been left red-faced today after it was revealed that they had accidentally booked Australian cricketing left-hander Mitchell Starc onto the panel for the first episode of 2017. Pre-existing rumours surrounding a hidden ABC left-wing agenda have all […]
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Watching your favourite local and international music acts is way better through a hand-sized mobile device, it has been confirmed. South Betoota Millenial, Declan Ballinger (24), says that when running out of iPhone battery ten minutes into Kendrick Lamar’s Brisbane tour made for a very disappointing night. “It just […]