2016 Census Results Suggests Everyone Needs To Calm The Fuck Down About Islam

2016 Census Results Suggests Everyone Needs To Calm The Fuck Down About Islam

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Former PM Tony Abbott has today joined other conservative minor party politicians in accusing the Australian Bureau of Statistics of driving a ‘leftie’ bias agenda – after a record number of people who claim “no religion” has overtaken Catholics in the 2016 Census Results. The most recent results show that “no religion” […]

Red Symons Confirms Iconic Nickname Came From The Colour Of His Neck

Red Symons Confirms Iconic Nickname Came From The Colour Of His Neck

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Former Hey Hey It’s Saturday regular and Skyhooks guitarist, Red Symons, has today confirmed all rumours about the colour of his neck, and how it is responsible for his nickname, after making a series of bizarre and racially loaded comments in an interview on his ABC radio show this morning. An edited […]

Neo-Nazi Wants Australia To Go Back To How It Was When His Pop Was At War With Nazis

Neo-Nazi Wants Australia To Go Back To How It Was When His Pop Was At War With Nazis

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local neo-nazi skinhead Bryce Cantrell (19) says he is sick of the attitudes held by people who don’t seem to care about Australia’s proud history. Bryce says he became a staunch anti-multiculturalist at the age of 15, which coincidentally was around the same time his parents divorced, leaving him without a father […]

Bloke Sticks Up For Mate That Nobody Else Likes By Insisting His Humour Is ‘Dry’

Bloke Sticks Up For Mate That Nobody Else Likes By Insisting His Humour Is ‘Dry’

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local bloke, Woodsy, refuses to acknowledge that his tag-a-long mate from another social circle is actually way funnier and charismatic than people give him credit for. Despite his housemates and other friends insisting his good mate Joey is actually a bit of a drain, Woodsy says it’s because his unique sense of […]

Mate Who Quit Durries Has Actually Only Quit Paying For Them

Mate Who Quit Durries Has Actually Only Quit Paying For Them

LEROY PERCIVAL | Music Editor | CONTACT Friends of Robert Winborough have slowing begun withdrawing him from social invite lists, fed up that the self-confessed reformed smoker has been punishing there hard-earned packs of ciggies. Winborough, 25, has been arriving at social gatherings armed only with his unique orange Bic lighter, quickly pulling up anyone who could potentially put […]

Sydney Spends $10 Million On Lighting To Distract Tourists From Their Lack Of Music

Sydney Spends $10 Million On Lighting To Distract Tourists From Their Lack Of Music

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT NSW Police will have 20,000 fully-armed officers on stand-by in Circular Quay over the next fortnight, As Sydney will be transformed into a ‘spectacular display of light, creativity and ideas’ – as the state forks out close to $10 million in power bills to shine cool pictures on landmarks. Sydney is reportedly […]

Clive Palmer A Bit Cranky With Grog Dog After Stepping On Grog Dog’s Grog Bog

"Oh, blast!" shouted the proud Queenslander.

Clive Palmer A Bit Cranky With Grog Dog After Stepping On Grog Dog’s Grog Bog

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Former Federal Member For Fairfax, Clive Palmer, was reportedly running late for all of today’s engagements after an unfortunate start to the morning. After dressing himself in fine Italian leather and linen for a big day of business, the mining magnate and Tim Tim-enthusiast found himself in an unfortunate predicament after stepping on […]