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Inner-city-Melbourne-based resident Michael Lyons, currently advising Government contractors in the CBD on the latest underground road-project, has become aware of the perils of the Ice-problem within the city.

Whilst lunching daily around the Swanston street precinct, he has seen local street dwellers cussing at strangers, and throwing general abuse at shoppers – he says it’s not something he used to see from within the safety of his heavily renovated terrace house just 10 kilometres away.

“It’s a real problem” he says.

“I hear these people get super human strength if they get provoked. I just keep to myself. I don’t even make eye contact”

Despite there being literally thousands of other possible reasons for the city’s homeless to come across as having a screw-loose, Michael has listened to enough conservative commentators discussing the issue on 3AW and 774 to know the real underlying cause.

“I don’t know what we are going to do about it. There was never this many homeless people around when I was growing up in Toorak… It’s completely out of control”

“I don’t understand why they do it to themselves. I never had it easy, but I made sure I never did ICE”

The Betoota Advocate went on to interview one of these apparently drug-riddled gutter-rats by the name of “Jesse”

He says that he ‘was bashed and abused as a kid” – and that the subsequent manic depression he suffers might explains his anti-social behaviour that makes Mr Lyons feel so uncomfortable.

“I really wish it was Ice” he says.

“Unfortunately I lack the interpersonal skills to even find myself a dealer. Let alone the money it costs to do drugs that make me feel better”

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