BONGO KNOWS Revealed To Be Wikileaks Founder, Julian Assange

BONGO KNOWS Revealed To Be Wikileaks Founder, Julian Assange

WEDNELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT

It can be revealed today that the service BONGO KNOWS is in fact operated by WikiLeaks founder, Julian Assange.

Following a special investigation by the Advocate it is now known that the popular service among teenagers is run by Julian Assange and anonymous team members from his controversial whistle-blowing network, WikiLeaks.

“Bongo Knows” is a text based service whereby people obtain scandalous information about friends and relatives for a small fee of $4.95 per text.

For those have often wondered, or asked friends “How does Bongo know so much ?” the answer is now clear.

In what appears to be a mutually beneficially relationship between the two, the documents obtained by the hacking organisation, have been used to let Lucy know who Stephen has been talking to, and much, much more.

While the WikiLeaks arm provides the sensitive information which can make or break fledgling relationships, the revenue raised from the$ 4.95 texts funds the more serious hacking of classified government documents, and the legal bills of Julian Assange.

Assange himself is believed to be spending his days in the confines of the Ecuadorian Embassy running the text line.

Local Tamworth mechanic Phil Dawson will never forgive Assange for what he did to him in high school.

“That fucking bloke went and texted my girlfriend saying I had shagged this other bird behind the science lab when I was in year 11″

“He got it wrong though, we only went to third”

 

2 Responses to "BONGO KNOWS Revealed To Be Wikileaks Founder, Julian Assange"

  1. Pudenda Non Grata   November 12, 2016 at 12:08 am

    Texting was available in Australia back when Mr. Assange was in school?

    Australians use American Baseball metaphors and/or euphemisms for the degree of physical intimacy achieved in clandestine sexual encounters?

    Say it ain’t so, Joe. Say it ain’t so!

    Reply

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