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Digitally Remastered Edition Of ‘Get Him To The Greek’ Now Just A Couple Scenes Of Rose Byrne 

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT For better or worse, the streaming revolution has meant pieces of media are now able to be edited with today’s political climate in mind, giving home media watchers the experience of watching a film on a plane. This had led to sitcoms such as Golden Girls and 30 Rock having ‘the blackface episodes’ removed as well as Community having...

Office SuperCoach Guy Reminded It’s A Long Season So Let’s Just Drip Feed This Chat For Now Mate

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT You may have heard about it in conversation or been bonked on the head with it but there is this thing called SuperCoach. If you need an explanation on what that is, keep reading and congratulations on your weekend activities with your partner. SuperCoach is a fantasy team building competition for Australia’s biggest sporting codes, and the NRL, where...

Tamworth Sent Into Lockdown After Barnaby Spotted Entering The Southgate To Break Lent

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT Australia’s country music capital has been sent into flash lockdown tonight as Tamworth braces for Cyclone Barnaby. After putting his usual ten schooner dinner on ice for the duration of Lent, it’s believed the Honorary Member for New England Barnaby Joyce has successfully navigated 40 days off the booze, and is now ready to cause his usual...

“Let’s Hit The Road A Bit Early” Says Man With Incredibly Unique And Genius Easter Travel Hack

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A forward thinking young man has today wowed his family, friends and workplace with an incredible display of logistical nous. Aaron Harley (24) from Betoota's Flight Path District has shown off his supreme foresight by texting his partner this morning and suggesting they leave a bit early this arvo. "Let's try and beat the traffic aye," texted Aaron,...

NSW Police Swarm Sydney Train Stations To Meet Strip Search Quotas After Cancellation Of Splendour

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactThe vibes in the NSW police office were reportedly pretty low this afternoon, as officers learned they would no longer have the opportunity to strip search people at this year’s Splendour in the Grass, due to the flagship musical festival being cancelled. It’s alleged the strip search task force had been really looking forward to this year’s event, stating...

Demons Clash With Port In Doubt After Entire Team Afflicted By Random Injuries Following F1 Weekend

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The AFL is dealing with its second crisis in as many days, after some shocking news has broken out of the Melbourne Demons training ground. Sources close to the Demons have revealed that the team's game against the Port Adelaide Football Club this weekend is in serious doubt. In a throwback to the days when games were cancelled...

AFL Says It’s Completely Fine For Players To Use Drugs If They Play Good Or Went To Right School

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The AFL has finally responded to a set of damning allegations that were levelled in parliament yesterday. Instead of trying to sweep things under the carpet like they normally do, league bosses have chosen to come clean about the raft of claims made by noted transparency activist Andrew Wilkie. "It's time we addressed the speculation. Drug use within the...

Young Townie Couple Beat Friends To Next Milestone By Getting Divorced Before 30th Birthdays

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Bree and Brendon Thompson just can't stop kicking goals. The trailblazing young couple from Betoota Heights have this week wowed their friends, by winning the race to another one of life's significant milestones. The couple were the first in their extended friendship circle to get engaged, married and buy a house, ticking off a number of goals ahead...

Persecuted Landlords Might Have To Sell One Of Their Properties After Entire Taxation System And Generational Wealth Is Unable To Protect Every Single Investment From The Real World

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A scary reality is facing some of Australia's most vulnerable people this year, as tough economic times continue to bite. Landlords across our great property speculating land are coming to terms with the fact that some of them might have to sell an investment property, or maybe even two. The horrific prospect comes after the Reserve Bank of...

Chooks Fan Packs Away Jersey After Attending His One Annual Live Match 10 Minutes From Home

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A brand new “retro-style” Roosters jersey has been handed into a Bondi Junction laundromat this week after being debuted at Allianz Stadium over the weekend. The Advocate understands that at approximately 10:15am yesterday morning Hugo Chiswick (28), from Paddington, needed to drop the jersey into Double Bubble Laundry on Oxford Street for a fresh steam clean. Born and...

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