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A local Kabi Kabi man was disappointed last night, after tuning into catch an episode from the 13th season of Deadliest Catch on Discovery Channel.
Having never watched the program before, Ashley Colby (28) says he was in the mood for some good old fashioned reality TV when he tuned in last night, but was shocked by what he saw.
“I saw it in the guide and thought it was gonna be like The Bachelor” he says.
“Even the opening theme song was Bon Jovi … Which obviously fits”
“…So I was shocked to learn that it’s just a show about the real life events aboard fishing vessels in the Bering Sea during the Alaskan king crab, snow crab and bairdi crab fishing seasons”
Ash says he was expected a Blackfella version of the wildly popular migaloo dating shows.
“I mean, that’s just what the name suggested” he said.
“I don’t mind eating crab… But seriously, I couldn’t watch a whole show dedicated to catching the fucking things – I don’t care how big the waves are”
“Trust whitefellas to put themselves in that kind of danger for no good reason. Like the girls who run upstairs in the horror movies instead of out the front door’
However, while Ash says he was surprised to learn an Aboriginal version of The Bachelor an Bachelorette doesn’t yet exist, he says he’s going to throw the idea to a couple mates from NITV.
“It would be some good fucking television, that’s for sure” he says.
“Episode 1 – they can trot out the aunty who knows everyones family and figure out who he’s related to”
“Episode 2, put him in the kitchen with some bully beef and worstershire – see how many he can feed at once”
“I’ve got a feeling it’d get a little bit more competitive than the other shows”