LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

A sunny afternoon just got a little brighter for local dad Wayne Crocker (48), as he started his lawnmower in just one pull, and is pretty confident the inferior man next door saw him do it.

“Was he looking? He was? Haha, classic.”

Usually a fan of besting his neighbour, Arnie Dale (35), in other ways such as extravagant Christmas decorations and having a bigger BBQ, Crocker made sure to wait for Dale to step outside before starting his lawnmower in a single stroke.

“Got him! Don’t even really need to mow!”

Crocker also used this opportunity to advise Dale on his exceptional mowing skills, pointing to his ability to mow easily beneath the trampoline and the immaculate edges he cut that separate the two properties to the millimetre.

“Yeah, you can borrow this one once I’m done if you like? I hear you’re still on a Parklander! This ought to do the trick a bit better. Here come try it out.”

Upon showing Dale the intricate pull-string method that starts his mower, he found himself becoming slightly aroused as his less masculine neighbour took two pulls to start the engine.

“Did you see that? Bet you he didn’t get his license on the first go either! Probably drives auto!”

From there, Crocker proceeded to show him the ease with which his ‘Honda HRU196M1 Buffalo Classic’ can handle rough terrain by mowing Dale’s front lawn.

“You don’t mind me cutting your grass do you Arnie! Haha!”

Speaking privately with The Advocate, Arnie Dale shared with us his thoughts on his neighbour’s dazzling lawnmower skills.

“One stroke every time? How does he do it? Fucking hell.”


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